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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25699030">too late to say goodbye</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloodamber/pseuds/bloodamber'>bloodamber</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Umbrella Academy - Missing Scene's, Fix-its &amp; Indulgent Ramblings [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Ben Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Dead Ben Hargreeves, Gen, Grief/Mourning, I just have a lot of feelings okay, I need a hug, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Klaus Hargreeves Whump, The Umbrella Academy (TV) Season 2 Spoilers, The Umbrella Academy (TV) Spoilers, please suffer along with me, pure angst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:09:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,009</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25699030</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloodamber/pseuds/bloodamber</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>He looked up at Vanya as she fell to her knees by his side and when their eyes locked he rasped out the only word that mattered.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Ben?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The sob that ripped its way free from her throat was answer enough and Klaus closed his eyes, struggling to breathe through the sudden weight of grief sitting on his chest.</em>
</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Hargreeves &amp; Klaus Hargreeves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Umbrella Academy - Missing Scene's, Fix-its &amp; Indulgent Ramblings [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1697917</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>208</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>too late to say goodbye</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Season 2 hurt me in so many ways so here’s some Klaus angst to make you suffer along with me. I apologize if this is a hot mess, it reflects my mental state right now.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Klaus fell back against the floor with jarring force, struggling to stay conscious as the waves of energy pinned him against the cold linoleum floor. </p><p>Allison and Diego were sprawled out around him, out cold, and Klaus felt a pang of regret that he hadn’t been enough to save them. Now he could only lay there, helpless to stop Vanya from losing control of her powers and destroying the world – again.</p><p>Ben stood over him, unaffected by the storm raging around them, and as tense their relationship had become in the past few days (years) Klaus was glad to have him here by his side in what might be the last moments of his life.</p><p>“Ben,” Klaus mouthed his brother's name, not sure what he was trying to communicate but feeling like he needed to say something. There was something weighted in that moment between them and Klaus got the distinct impression Ben was trying to communicate something that words could not express. But Klaus could barely get his mind to focus, let alone understand the complicated rush of emotions that flitted across his brother's face.</p><p>In the end, Ben offered him a small, sad smile in return before turning away and walking down the hallway. </p><p>Klaus twisted his body, trying to keep Ben in his sight, hand reaching out instinctively towards his brother as he walked further into the light that spilled from the room until he was entirely eclipsed by it. </p><p>A spark of hope grew in Klaus, as he realized what Ben was about to attempt and he shifted his focus inwards, searching for the tether that connected Ben’s soul to his own. The tether that he had only become aware of in the past 3 years when he had started to explore the full extent of his new powers. </p><p>And with the knowledge that Ben might be their only hope of calming Vanya down, he fed his energy into Ben, putting all his focus into manifesting Ben and giving him the power to touch Vanya and bring her back to reality.</p><p>Long moments passed, in which only sheer stubbornness kept him conscious as he continued to pour his energy into Ben before Klaus sensed that something had shifted.</p><p>He felt a tug, and then the sensation of the tether between himself and Ben being stretched too thin. It left him breathless, his heart beating too fast in his chest as he scrambled to maintain the connection between them, even as he feels it begin to fray.</p><p>"<em>No, </em>" he croaked, panic seeping into his bones when the tether continued to disintegrate despite his mental effort to hold on to his brother.</p><p>Then, for a brief moment, he felt the touch of his brother's soul against his own – a fleeting warm feeling of peace – before the connection snapped.</p><p>Klaus gasped at the shock of it, curling in on himself as the waves of energy began to ebb, furniture and dead FBI agents falling to the ground around him.</p><p>Squinting towards the doorway, Klaus watched as Vanya stepped out, the glow shrinking back into her chest until his sister stood there, looking as small and unthreatening as usual. She took in the scene, face crumpling with horror and regret before she ran forward to where Klaus lay with his siblings.</p><p>He looked up at her as she fell to her knees by his side and when their eyes locked he rasped out the only word that mattered.</p><p>“<em>Ben? </em>”</p><p>The sob that ripped its way free from her throat is answer enough and Klaus closed his eyes, struggling to breathe through the sudden weight of grief sitting on his chest. </p><p>He heard his siblings stir around him, Allison the first to find her equilibrium as she pulled a distraught Vanya into a tight hug. Then Diego stumbled to his feet, making for the window where distant sounds from the parade can be heard.</p><p>But Klaus couldn’t find the strength to get off the floor.</p><p>He could only lay there and stare forward at his outstretched hand, the word on his palm mocking him.</p><p>
  <em> GOODBYE. </em>
</p><p>He closed his hand into a fist, nails biting into the soft flesh of his palm, but the pain barely registered. It was nothing to the aching emptiness welling up inside him at the knowledge that his brother was now completely beyond his reach.</p><p>His brother, who had been his rock through so much of his life. The one constant he could rely on, even after all the shit he had forced Ben to endure. And Klaus knew he had taken for granted that Ben would always be there.</p><p>Because sure, Ben had <em> died</em>. But he had never really been <em> gone. </em> At least, not for Klaus.</p><p>He’d never had to mourn the same way his siblings had and now it felt like two decades worth of grief was hitting him all at once. And it was all he could do to keep breathing, feeling the warm trickle of tears spill down his cheeks as he struggled to reconcile that he would never hear Ben’s patronizing remarks or bear witnesses to his judgemental eye rolls.</p><p>Klaus supposed he should be happy that his brother had finally found peace, yet he wished there had been more time. A chance for him to say goodbye properly. A chance to apologize for being a terrible brother. But if there was one thing his life had taught him, it was that things were rarely fair.</p><p>He felt a touch on his shoulder and blinked away tears to find Allison hovering over him, concern creasing her brow.</p><p>“Klaus, we need to go.”</p><p>Operating on autopilot, he stumbled to his feet and followed Allison and Vanya as they picked their way through the debris and dead bodies, only hesitating when he reached the end of the hall. </p><p>Turning, Klaus looked back, his eyes picking out the last place he had seen his brother and lifting his hand – the inked word on his palm facing out – he whispered into the silence.</p><p>“Goodbye, Ben.”</p>
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